Most people spin on the fantasy wheel when they think of Libra, which they associate with idealized relationships. Libra’s polarity planet Aries helps put our relationship musings into perspective. The current planetary movements support a loving shift in how we relate to ourselves and each other.
October 9 – Full Moon in Aries 16°
1:55 PM PDT (utc -7)
This full moon is lined up to support our personal healing with an extra dose of love. Chiron (what needs to be healed) in Aries is conjunct the full moon. Venus (how healing happens) in Libra is conjunct the Sun. The Chiron influence initially exposes the wounds that need to be healed. Libra and Venus remind us that healing happens through love.
October 9 – Pluto Goes Direct at 26° Capricorn
Pluto has been retrograde since April 29, slowly inching back from 28 to 26 degrees. When an outer planet like Pluto changes direction, its energy is more intense for a few days before and after the shift. So don’t be surprised if you feel intense emotions that you may not be able to explain.
Pluto’s impact is often cathartic. Pluto forces us to get into alignment by releasing what is not honest and authentic in our psyche. We can experience intense feelings and be triggered at a deep level. Pluto’s purification creates space for something new to happen. When these intense days pass, we will feel a welcome release and be in a new space.
October 11 – Mercury Enters Libra
When Mercury enters Libra, we will feel a sense of relief from the messages of love broadcast by Mercury. It will be easier to relax and be kind to ourselves and each other.
October 2 – November 28 – Mars Square Neptune
Mars in Gemini squares Neptune in Pisces within an active 3 degrees for two months. Compassion and creativity can be activated and so can escapism, illusion, and deception.
Mars in Gemini advises us to be honest, but also careful with our communications. Neptune in Pisces reminds us to listen to our hearts and follow the wisdom of love. Mars and Neptune are working together to help us pay attention to what we say, listen to, and interact with and to discriminate fear from love, bogus from truth, judgment from observation.
The most potent question for the Aries/Libra pair is ‘Who is in relationship with whom?’ Are two wounded and confused egos trying to defend themselves? Are two souls recognizing and supporting each other?
There are a multitude of dysfunctional ideas about relationships. The bottom line is that most of us are living a lie. We aren’t honest with ourselves. And we are not honest with each other.
Revealing Results from a Survey to Men
A survey posed the following question to men: “Why do men lie to women?’ Here is a summary of the results.
[1] The Relationship with Our Mother
The habit of lying to women started with the relationship with their mother. They didn’t feel safe if they told the truth. They lied to their mother to get what they wanted. They learned to say what they thought their mother wanted to hear. Telling the truth was scary because they never knew how their mother would react.
[2] Men Are Emotionally Fragile
The men who responded admitted that they were emotionally fragile. Their defense is to shut down their emotions and ‘act like a man.’ This behavior is obviously supported by our culture that tells little boys ‘Boys don’t cry.’ This could be considered a form of abuse to the male psyche.
[3] Men Are Scared of Woman’s Emotions
The men also said that they were scared of women’s emotions. They don’t know how to deal with a woman’s mood swings that freak them out. This started with their mothers and is carried into their relationships with women.
[4] Can’t Measure Up to Prince Charming Fantasy
The men admitted that they feel unworthy in the face of women’s ‘prince charming fantasies.’ Since they can’t measure up, they feel pressured into being fake. Or they escape into their work to distance themselves from a myth that they cannot live up to.
The above and more are all deep programs with serious consequences for both the success of our relationships and our personal happiness.
Obviously this is a problem involving the beliefs, conditioning, behavior, and expectations of both men and women and how we relate to each other. Relationship issues can generally be traced back to early wounds related to self-love, self-worth, and suppressed emotions of shame, fear, and anger.
We Are All Lying
It is a serious problem when we can’t tell when the other person is lying to us. And it is an even more serious problem when we can’t tell when we are lying to ourselves! The bottom line is that to some extent we have all learned to lie to each other and to ourselves.
The Libra archetype invites us to examine how our relationship issues are based on assumptions that are not true and motivations that sabotage authentic connection.
The Aries archetype invites us to examine our relationship with ourselves and how our perceived inadequacies sabotage our authenticity. What are we doing to ourselves?
Liberation from Lying
How can we extricate ourselves from the pandemic of lying and pretending?
[1] Self-honesty
First, we have to be honest with ourselves. We have to tell ourselves our truth.
It is critical to remember that self-honesty means that your inner conversation is between YOU and YOU. Absolutely no one else is involved! You are not talking to anyone else and you are not sharing your truth with anyone else now or later.
If you examine your inner conversation closely, you may find that you are talking either to your mother or that your inner voice is a critical mother (super ego) talking to you.
There is this thing now about always telling everyone the truth. I am for honesty, but this can be misinterpreted. First and on-goingly, we need to talk to ourselves, listen to what is going on inside, and be in touch with our own emotions, reaction, beliefs, and motivations.
If we want a clean relationship with another, we have to get clean with ourselves. This means doing our own inner work on why we are angry, afraid, or sad and not project on and blame someone who triggers frustration that started in our relationship with our parents when we were very young.
[2] Compassion toward ourselves
The human journey is full of challenges that we learn to deal with through experience. No one is born knowing what to do. Given this situation that every human must deal with, it is wise to be loving with ourselves.
We have to like ourselves to be happy. Someone else loving us cannot eliminate the inner void that causes us to seek external approval and attention.
As adults our healing requires that we are connected enough to ourselves and our own self-nurturing powers to no longer need external approval and attention from anyone who represents our projected mother. We say we want to be free. But at an unconscious level, do we really? Our deepest liberation comes from loving, enjoying, and approving of ourselves.
The Aries/Libra Challenge – Homework
The Aries/Libra challenge is to change our relationship with ourselves and monitor how that impacts our relationships with others. This is actually a fun game to play with ourselves.
Homework – The most impactful thing we can do is to be compassionate with ourselves. Be nice to yourself. Don’t rush and create unnecessary anxiety. Enjoy what you are doing. Enjoy being present to your body.
Results – How we treat ourselves and relate to ourselves will be carried over to our relationships. When you have the habit of being compassion with yourself, are you more compassionate with others? Experiment and see if this is true.
How we treat ourselves creates the presence that others connect with. When we are angry and unkind to ourselves, it is that disturbing energy that we project and offer to others. When we are loving to ourselves, our presence offers the vibration of love. When we are at peace with ourselves, we offer peace to others. Again, check it out for yourself.
How we dance with ourselves determines how we partner and interact with others. How we relate to ourselves determines how we relate to others. If we are a ‘damsel in distress’ we can save ourselves through self-love.
Meditation to Activate Your Inner Smile
How do we know our truth? How do we recognize universal truth? Only our heart knows. How does our heart message us that we are in our truth channel? A smile comes to our face. We just know. We are happy for no specific reason. A subtle sense of joy fills our being.
The Smiling Buddha Meditation – Opening the Heart to Christ Consciousness on page 155 in Transitions to a Heart-Centered World can have this effect.
Years ago after I first practiced this meditation for 11 minutes for 40 days, I began to notice that only positive relationships came into my life. It seemed as though my state of being magnetized only what aligned with my truth and my heart. Practice this meditation with the suggestions above for self-compassion and self honesty and share what you experience.
Smiling Buddha Kriya
Opening the Heart to Christ Consciousness
Sit in Easy Pose. Bend ring and little fingers, pressing them down with the thumbs, keeping index and middle fingers straight, palms forward. Elbows are pressed back. A 30 degree angle is made between the upper arms and forearms. The forearms parallel to each other.
Concentrate at the third eye diligently, and mentally chant (at the third eye)
SAA TAA NAA MAA
“Sa” — Infinity; “Ta” — Life, existence; “Na” — Death; “Ma” — Rebirth, light, regeneration. The whole mantra means “I am truth.” Make sure the elbows are pressed back and the chest is out. Continue for 11 minutes or more. To end, inhale deeply, exhale, open and close the fists several times, stretch up, and relax.
Sit silently or rest on your back. Enjoy being you and being alive.
You may have seen this mudra in paintings and statues. It is a gesture and exercise of happiness, and it opens the flow of energy to the heart center. You needn’t worry about learning this kriya to be a Buddha or a Jesus — just learn it to be yourself! Be a little selfish for your higher consciousness. Master the technique and experience the state it brings. Then share it by creating beauty and peace around you.
You will find this and many other meditations in my book – Transitions to a Heart Centered World – p.155 (2nd Edition). Also available as an eBook.
